Category Archives: bathroom

Serial Killer, store

Random driving around and through parking centers and such. Very busy places.

I was in a retail location similar to Target with a group of familiar people. I was browsing around and we were there waiting for people. I got tired of waiting, but we had to wait. I had a low-grade need to go poop, but I didn’t want anyone to know, so I went looking for the most private bathroom available. Looking, looking, looking, but everywhere I found one was right in the midst of people. Ugh! As I was searching, I saw what looked like a big horse stuffie on the ground at the end of an aisle. Didn’t think much about it until a bunch of Target security people with walkies rushed by and started reporting, “the killer is here again! This time it’s a horse!” I pretended to browse by and looked at the horse again. Huh. Scary. Bored, I kept hanging around trying to listen in but soon they moved on. What I got from it was that a serial killer had been hitting the store and this time they had been very bold, killing almost immediately after the bait was set. Apparently they were getting very close to figuring out who it was.

The place started to change as everything grew dark. I opened the door in the corner and finally found a private bathroom, but that had a door to the outside which had been left open. An angry, large hornet was in there and I turned and ran for it. It followed me! I hurried to find someone to help me and came upon the group of females I’d been with. It was all similar to anime movies where the other girls were all different types of hot with predictable personalities. One was very excited about our mission to help capture the serial killer and started rattling off how she would dress each of the girls to best bait the trap to draw the killer out. Each of the proposed costumes popped up in the air for viewing and as I looked at them, every one was so impractical. I sniggered and asked the girl who was going to make the costumes and she stopped then drooped because yeah no one knew how to make those and the fabric was just impossible to find. Then more discussion followed and then it was time for the girl we’d been waiting for to get off her workshift. She seemed to be the coolest and most experienced of the gaggle (signified by having the biggest boobs). And she was very calm, collected and gently assertive. She listened intently to the plan and while they were doing that, I decided it was time to check out the bathroom again. Woohoo! No more hornet and some had closed the door for me!

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Filed under bathroom, driving, girls, mission, shopping

Mixed Family, Beach, dog food, disabled kid, sweeping

I was going to my aunt’s mansion for a family get-together. We all know her house is big, but this was more like a manor mansion than a house. It had been years since I’d been to their house and I was the first one to arrive. They couldn’t be found, really, either, so I just wandered around, reminding myself of the house. I remember thinking about how awful it must be to maintain such a monstrous home especially now without any kids to inhabit it. They had left the kids’ playroom perfectly intact, toys strewn about like they’d never left. It was rather creepy. I saw my uncle’s man-cave and noticed a hidden room panel which I proceeded to try to unscrew the bolts from to get in. It was hard to unscrew quickly by hand and I didn’t make it before we were all called to the kitchen area. Other family members started piling in and weirdly enough, the family members were mostly the members from my mom’s family, not my dad’s. There was this thing about the chairs that were never done and the men started talking about it. I was trying to wrap my brain around what they were discussing. It was a DIY sofa where the seat sections sat on rails and could be slid around and reconfigured as desired. I didn’t like the idea but tried to contribute to the conversation by offering 2 ideas: 1) now I don’t remember, and 2) to give them a brake handle since they slide around on the metal tracks. My uncle gave me a weird, dismissive look and said they already have those. I was like, huh? All the men seemed embarrassed that I even had an opinion. My nice uncle from my mom’s side tried to give it all a positive spin like he usually does, in a practical way. By then my cousins (now from my dad’s side) had just arrived and they were the last ones expected. Then some announcement was made.

Then I was in a store with my cousins and my one cousin’s boyfriend. I hadn’t like him since we were in the house, but whatever, not my problem. He was not only extremely inappropriate, especially given all the kids around, but he kept trying to be the center of attention, which he wasn’t. We were all sitting at the end of an aisle and I was trying not to pay attention to the dumb boyfriend’s suggestive remarks and my cousin’s appalled-but-not faces. I walked over to a hallway where people were going to the bathroom and remarked, “Wow I wouldn’t go in there that is smellllllly (I assume Gable farted in my room).”

Eventually I went into one of the bathrooms and it turned into an academy where some groups of students were being forced to watch weird costume actors randomly come in and get beat up by a “hero.” There was some argument amongst the actors and there was some running around in the greenspace enclosed by a stone wall.

Now I’m at the beach. I go out to the water and try to fish in it. Whenever my hook touched something it would turn into something else. I kept asking people to grab the items for me before they floated away, but no one would do anything. Finally, I went to grab one and found out that I was not only the only one who could see them, but the only one who could touch them. Figures. I went back into the house only to come back out. It’s  nighttime. This time, though, the entire place was FILLED with other beachgoers and I had to pick my way through them. I walked around saying “excuse me” over and over again. Half of them moved, half of them didn’t (white people). I stepped over all sorts of small children. I eventually found an open space at the edge of a square of sand, but then a bunch of people piled up in front of me. Some stragglers came in and asked if there were any open spots. I pointed to the middle that I could clearly see was empty, when the couple in front of me gets mean saying, “There is NO spot there!” I’m like, uhhhh…I can see it. And kept pointing people to the spot. I think they just didn’t want people in front of them. Everyone’s too afraid to move. Their loss. That’s when the move starts and it’s about a young boy with Down syndrome being kept in poor conditions. He lives out of a stone bathroom. They give him one of those sample mattress squares to sleep on. While they feed him regularly, a faceless man would come in and abuse him. They never let him out. The movie goes on to chronicle his life. The dumb couple in front of me, is indignant about his abuse. We turn out to be the only people still hanging around and a cleaning lady comes by to vacuum everything up. The 3 of us were so moved by the movie that they pick up brooms each to help sweep all the dog food off the floor. I can’t stand watching these rich white people inadequately sweeping, so I pick up my own broom to fix their inadequacy. I go into the storage room where they keep the dog food and there are so many pieces on the ground! It’s never ending!

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Filed under bathroom, beach, family, house

Dairy Queen, coworkers, working, rain, bathroom

I was walking home in my scrubs. It was getting dark and I was very tired, unable to keep my eyes open, but I was almost home! Because it was raining, I really didn’t want my scrubs to get mud on them, so I decided to walk on the wood piece separating the mulch from the grass. It wasn’t perfectly straight, so I held on to some trees for support, but then there weren’t any trees. I lost my balance and stepped off to the right, preparing for the squelch of mud, but it was dry! yay! Almost near the pavement, I looked out and saw that the orange-red setting sun was making a neato scene, so I pulled out my phone and got low to take a picture that didn’t show any cars in it. I snapped 2 photos before I started hearing some noise. It was my neighbor’s daughter with her daughter. I suddenly was very self conscious, and went to walk into the building, but the girl kept dancing around me. I said “excuse me” and pushed into the building.

I wanted to go straight through the next set of doors into the dormitories, but passing in front of me in the same direction was an old co-worker and a new friend of hers. They were clearly just getting off shift from the Dairy Queen. My friend/coworker, Q, suddenly next to me, exclaimed a greeting at K which forced me to be nice and say hi, too. Instead of going the same way, we took the right and went to the DQ for food. Instead of food, they set us in seats away from each other and started going over the rules of employment. They thought we were new employees! Listening quietly to the strict rules, I thought to myself, why would anyone want to work here? but there were so many current employees there too! Then, a song came on and everyone had to stand. Three workers were up front singing and dancing to it in synchrony. I looked around and saw other employees dancing along. What…in…the…world…? My coworker seemed to be brainwashed by all of it. Was I the only one not taken in by all of this? Finally, it was over and they set meals in front of us. It wasn’t bad, honestly. I got some collard greens and mashed potatoes. By then, I just wanted to go the dormitory so I could sleep, but then everyone sat down as a big group and started listening to more presentations about employee expectations and rules. I swear I was being inducted into an evil cult. One guy with blonde hair in a bowl cut stood up and walked over to the door. I jumped up and followed him, aware that all eyes were on us. He looked back at the crowd which was pretending not to see us, but I could feel the disapproval. He seemed disappointed but entered the next area anyways. I was just grateful to have an excuse to leave. As we walked on, 2 more girls came with us, giggling and gossiping. He said something to the effect of, “I thought they were going to come with me to rebel.” Since it didn’t pertain to me, I didn’t respond.

Stuff happened and then I was back in the seating area because I was hungry again. The meeting had dispersed and there was an overseer doling out food. I took my seat again and coworker K came out to see what was going on. I was glad to see her. While eating, I looked around with new eyes and I could suddenly see the allure of working here. Everyone seemed to happy and fulfilled. Young to middle aged worked together, no doubt some of them having stayed for years on end. Reason dictated that it must be an awesome job for people to act the they were. A part of me wanted to quit my job and just come work there. Thankfully, I had to use the bathroom which pulled me back to my senses. I announced that I had to go to the bathroom and suddenly, the happiness of the place took a dive and all eyes came to rest suspiciously upon me. What was the problem with going to the bathroom? So I got up and confidently walked to the back of the room. Past the heavy, red grate, into the musty, expansive back area that looked like a massive storeroom. It was empty, though, and I swear I could smell earth. Like a series of tunnels would extend from it. There were signs everywhere saying “Stop,” “Do not Enter,” and “Authorized personnel only.” The sparse fluorescent light bulbs didn’t help the creepy factor in the least, but I really had to poop. I found the bathroom which was just as creepy but seemed to be clean enough. A severe-looking man in a red cap and janitor clothing glared at me, while utilizing his push broom right before I locked the heavy, metal door and pushed it closed. Then tried to poop. I was having a hard time getting anything to come out. Maybe the food wasn’t real after all.

Suddenly. I hear voices. My other “coworkers.” A girl just pushed her way into the bathroom which was perplexing because I swear I had already locked and closed it. I didn’t seem bothered much by the fact that people saw me sitting on the can. The door was now not a solid door, but the same heavy, metal gate as earlier. People were crowding around to look at me now and I kept trying to lock them out because this was getting really scary. I got the feeling like they suspected me of trying to escape or plot against them. Even if I was, this was just a job working at DQ, right? RIGHT?!?! THe door would just not stay closed! I was starting to panic, unable to poop properly (amazing constipation), and feeling like my life was in danger. Their excited, happy faces all around the door and pushing towards me. I uncomfortably realized that their eyes were vacant, like their brains. This place was evil! I needed to escape! Just after I successfully poop.

I didn’t.

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Filed under bathroom, co-workers, escape, fear, strange, work

Disease

I can’t remember if I was in school or if it was a work thing or a summer class, but I’m with a group of people I’m not familiar with. We’re on a trip of sorts together along the lines of field trip, perhaps. We’d just learned about something and everyone’s paying attention to the instructor. Then we do something outside in a neighborhood/house area with grass, hot sunshine, picnic tables and umbrellas. We bond a bit as a group (kind of like an ice breaker) before we go into a building and sit around in the waiting room filling out paperwork. Along the way, a few of the students come down with something, manifesting as scabs on their faces. It was the thing we were just learning about. My head is itchy and I find out that my face is breaking out with 2 of the viruses we’d just covered. I make the mistake of picking at the one on my forehead because the instant I do, it spreads rapidly across my brow and down the side of my face. This is just awful. I finish my paperwork for the office and approach the desk to submit it. Everyone is very oblivious to the horrible thing spreading on my face. The lady cheerfully tells me to turn in the paperwork to guest services. I’m so scared about what’s going to happen to me. I can’t find the desk where I need to be and the lady laughs, rolling over to the other side of the desk because guest services is right there. I smile a bit because it’s funny, but I’m still terrified. This program I’m in is providing benefits to us which is why I’m so scared because I really need to remain in this group. They tell me that because of what’s happened to me, I need to go see a doctor before they allow me to continue and that I’m dismissed until it is done. The lady is still very kind as if this happens a lot, and says as long as you get a paper from the doctor outlining the treatment plan, then it’s enough and I can continue. I have never felt so much like a failure. I sag and trudge out of there, unable to meet the eyes of my group. Thankfully, the program provides health insurance, so I head over right away to the doctor. I’m afraid that they won’t have any openings this late, but they are able to squeeze me in. I sit in the crowded waiting room and wish and pray that it won’t be the same doctor I had last time. Turns out, I get an older lady, short with white/gray hair and glasses (who looks suspiciously like the patient I never found out what happened to). It’s like closing time and she sees me, still not horribly concerned about my face and tells me that they’re going to have to run some tests. I leave and then realize I forgot to get that piece of paper!! Turns out, as luck would have it, that she lives in the same housing complex as me and my mom, so I was able to talk to her and she told me to come to her workplace tomorrow and she’ll write it up. I ask her where she will be the next day and she says she’ll be in Miracle Mall. She says she wishes she could work at William and Mary, but noooo….

I go to sleep and wake up early and look up this location. I’m excited to find that it’s only 9 minutes away! I go the back roads and realize this is where my mom went with my sister just a few weeks ago. Yeah, I know the way. We get to the mall and cut through a store to go through the mall. It’s supposed to be 7am but the mall is just teeming with shoppers. There’s even a Han Solo and Chewbacca cosplay going on. We walk outside and come upon the place where I think it is. I’m confused, though, because it looks like a super old and super dingy café. I ask the girl about Nurse Dunn after poking my head around and she said she’d go find what happened to everyone. We take a seat on the wooden chairs at a table and wait. The place fills up with patients, mostly kids and their parents. I’m playing on my phone and waiting and waiting and waiting. The NP had told me that she wasn’t so busy that day and that she’d fit me in, but she completely forgot even though her schedule only had 2 patients. I needed to poop, so I decided to just go ahead and poop. Later, my mom complained that someone decided to poop on the ground and it was disgusting. I feigned exasperation, picked up and bag and picked up the poop like dog poop. I was STILL waiting. Right when I think my turn is coming up,

–I wake up.

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Filed under bathroom, disease, school

Bathroom, dad, cleaning, fire, dog

I really, really really had to go to the bathroom but kept putting it off.

There was lots of driving after an action filled segment dealing with sniping, sky diving and shooting and such. Just driving all over the map on fun, traffic-light-less roads. My mom and I ended up in a quaint little city. I desperately had to use the bathroom, but I wanted to make sure I was  a paying customer before I asked to use their bathroom. I left my mom to get us a seat or order whatever it was in the posh place (we were SO out of place in the white-dominated locale, but everyone was nice) and moved to find the bathroom. There were little signs everywhere to tell you to go to the back of the buildings. There I saw 3 bathrooms that were all but a toilet behind a door. I used it successfully, felt better, and returned to the restaurant. Some stuff happened and we left and explored a bit. Then my mom come upon a very old friend from over a decade ago and they did stuff together. I had to use the bathroom again, so I returned to that other place except this time it was raining and really crowded. When I finally got to use a toilet, there was a lady in a dress directing traffic, standing right in front of them. It was kind of weird, but I really had to go, so whatever. Unfortunately for me, I was having issues. The door to the toilet was NOT staying closed. I’d lock the latch and it would fly open. Over and over. The lady kept staring at me sitting on the can and the crowd too, waiting their turn. No matter how hard I tried I could NOT keep the door closed!

Then I was in a very large, unfamiliar house. It had easily 8 large bedrooms upstairs. I was irritated and upset (probably about the toilet thing) and then had some sort of argument with my mom. I went into my 2nd room (because why not, if there are so many bedrooms) and, still upset, started sorting through all of my stuff there. I picked up a big trash bag and started jamming things I no longer needed into it to donate. In the middle of it all, my sibling who was much younger than me (probably 6 or 7?) came rushing in (I didn’t recognize him at all) and started saying something. I yelled at him to get out of my room and felt a little bad, but not too much. Then I got another interruption when someone else opened the door, I got up in a huff and marched over to see my dad there looking in with an annoying grin on his face. I yelled at him to leave, go away and slammed the door. What is WRONG with everyone? Finally, I finish cleaning the room and WOW what a difference. It is massive and mostly empty, the white carpet pristine with the sun shining through. That’s when I realized something was wrong. There was a lot of commotion outside and I smelled smoke! Instantly I became worried and ran out. The rest of the upstairs was empty and I called for Gable. He came right to me and I grabbed his leash while he danced around my feet. The fire was spreading rapidly and I could hear sirens, but they were still a distance away. I felt hurt that my family didn’t care to tell me of the danger, but then I realized that I’d pushed everyone away so I shouldn’t blame anyone at all. Plus, it didn’t matter because I was an adult and responsible for myself. I led Gable down the stairs, across the river of water at the base of the stairs, and across and up the next stairs to the kitchen. We were safe. My other siblings (black people, no one I recognize) were running around, busy and I turned to the right to go find my mom.

Then I wake up.

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Filed under bathroom, dad, dogs, driving, embarrass, family, fire, house

Uncle, mall, bathroom, Walmart

I was at a mall with some relatives. The bigger group was somewhere else and we were set to meet up later with them. I happened to be with my uncle. We arrived around the same time and parked in the same vicinity. When we walked into the entrance (it was dark and snowy/windy out) I might have needed to go to the bathroom. Not really, but for some reason we both went towards the bathrooms. He was super chatty and I just kind of stood there nodding. There seemed to be tours conducted of the bathrooms, so we went into the women’s side and looked around. Men and women were in there, not using the bathroom, but just kind of milling around, taking a tour? My uncle was looking at a pamphlet that highlighted the different stalls available for use. Some bigger, some smaller, some with more amenities for little kids. It all seemed very efficient. Then we went to the men’s bathroom. It was similar except with stall-urinals, the same varying sized stalls. I pointed out that there was a useful one in the corner that looked a lot like a bathroom in a home, for ultimate privacy. The men’s was full of, well, men. The tour was over, so I left, but my uncle stayed. I contemplated going to the bathroom, myself, while I waited for him, but after a long period of time elapsed and he didn’t come out, I decided to go in and find him. The men inside seemed to have no care that I was there and acted like the bathroom was one huge locker room/lounge combo. I couldn’t find my uncle anywhere and I even went to look in the shower and even in the laundry area. Finally, there he was, laughing and having a good time with the other guys. This was totally out of the ordinary for him. He almost seemed drunk or like an amnesiac. I have NEVER seen him that relaxed before. I told him we needed to go and he kind of just waved me off. He was also not wearing his clothes, just an undershirt and boxers like all the other guys. I went to the dryer and found his clothes neatly folded there. Suddenly over the loudspeaker, they called for him. It sounded like the interview or work thing he needed to be at! His face changed into seriousness, though he still didn’t or couldn’t grasp what was going on. He quickly ran over to pull on his clothing, still chuckling. He said he didn’t want to wear the pants from before, so I said you can wear mine then, which was black dress pants. He said okay and was happy wearing them. I put on his freshly washed and dried pants and understood why he didn’t want to wear them to his important event: they were navy blue shiny, form fitting joggers. He ran off to his destination, leaving me in this locker room. I left and they were singing Christmas carols.

Then my dad had brought me and my brother to Walmart. It was again dark and cold out. Rainy. Thankfully, my mom was inside and I happily ran up to her. My sister was there too. We were looking at Christmas lights and I remembered that I’d thrown most of mine away last year. I’d need new ones! I put something in my cart and then it was time to go. I saw something outside I also put in my cart before asking my brother where the car was. I rode the cart to my mom’s car through some snow, dreading that I wouldn’t be going home with her. Then I saw to my delight that it was MY car and I wouldn’t have to go home with him after all. However, I suddenly realized that I’d never paid for the last item I took! I left my cart at my car with instruction for someone to load it in and ran inside to pay. As I was running in I questioned whether I’d even paid for the other one. My mom was close behind me and I dodged the detector as I walked in. The item in question was a box of winter themed Cap’n Crunch cereal.

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Filed under bathroom, dad, family, shopping

House, neighborhood, family, girl, work

I was walking through a neighborhood to my grandma’s house. It was a very old neighborhood with smaller, quaint homes, similar to the neighborhood I grew up in. When I got to her house, I found my mom and sister discussing something. Looking around, I noticed that every single home had taped to them large signs apparently from the HOA. Along with the signs were large plastic zip bags with stuff in them. It looked like the HOA was trying to get the homes compliant…and honestly, they were right to do so. Initially I was confused because I was pretty sure my grandma’s neighborhood only had a civic association. Perhaps they were trying to clean the place up. I started walking around some more, taking in the homes and someone was with me. I explained to them that I agree with the HOA because, man, the homes needed a good push. Some properties were very well maintained, but many of them were falling apart, had grass up to your waist and other issues. I was also speculating about why the HOA was hitting this part so hard, especially since that area was very rich. Sidewalks vs. non.

Then I was inside of one of the small homes. My home. The living room was very small, but I didn’t care because it was mine. My brother was there and I’d just come home so I called out to Gable to come to me as I sat down on the couch. He ran over, but Liana came rushing over too, right to me. I remember being surprised and almost horrified. In my head I kept telling myself she was just an apparition, a wish, a memory, BUT she was solid. I touched her, hugged her, all the while in disbelief. I kept asking my brother is she was real and he just shrugged. She was solid. Eventually I allowed myself a little happiness despite still trying to work through it all. I got up to start dinner. Gable went in first and I herded Liana that way too, but as she was passing between the TV stand and the couch, she decided to lift her leg on the TV stand. I yelled a, “NO!” She stopped and kept moving but then decided she wanted to poop. Exasperated because it seemed like I was going to be unable to stop her, I scooped her up, held her upside down and marched with her into the kitchen. She managed to squeeze out 3 tiny poops before I stuck her bottom under the sink faucet. All I remember is she weighed nothing, though she was warm and furry in my hands. And very much alive.

I’m at work and I was to see a mom and her kid. I went to sit the kid in the chair, but mom decided she wanted to go first. The older son decided to sit on a chair in front of my computer while the younger son (my patient) ran off towards the window. I hadn’t realized he was so YOUNG, but hey, I’m already seeing a patient, so let’s just do it. I asked him if he wanted to be hefted up into the chair with his mom and he said yes, so I tried to pick him up to help, but I couldn’t squeeze my fat body between mom and the other son, so I didn’t. Then I proceeded to clean mom’s teeth. When she opened, her molars were JAMMED with Skittles! Smashed skittles, mush Skittles, whole Skittles, you name it all clogging up her occlusals. I was trying to figure out the best way to remove them when she suddenly asked for the suction. I confusedly gave her the small suction and she said, “No, the big one.” I don’t keep a tip on it, so I turned it on and held it out for her. She then proceeded to spit the Skittles in her mouth out one by one like watermelon seeds into it. I stood there holding the suction like, uuuhhhhhh, and wondering how clogged it was going to make the unit. It was taking a while despite me trying to go as fast as possible (I usually try to do the kids first because they get bored) and the kid kept complaining about why it wasn’t his turn. Finally, I just kicked mom out of the chair and had the kid sit in it. I asked my coworker to do me a favor and get me another instrument kit and she did, but begrudgingly, giving me a face. I’d have to deal with that later. Mom starting giving me a hard time about him not being able to finish some story about teeth in the  waiting room and he kept saying he wanted to know what happened! I tell them they can always read it on the way out. So then I get him to open up to start and am appalled by what I see. His little mouth was full of crowns, bridges and implants. To his credit, he was an amazing 5 year old in the chair, but then again, given how many restorations were in his mouth, it wasn’t all that surprising either. I picked around a bit, pulling what seemed like cottage cheese curds from under the bridges and then finished with that, I pronounced him done and was about to set off to find the dentist. A panoramic had shown up on my screen, showing his teeth and the kid basically just had 4 implants supporting all the bridges in the maxilla. Having walked away already, I realized that I hadn’t polished his teeth yet. NO one had complained until the doctor came into the room and he demanded that I do it. Since the family was no longer sitting in the operatory but was instead walking around inside a Kmart clothes section, I started chasing the kid around with a toothbrush and an unplugged suction, the hose trailing on the ground. I laughed at the absurdity in the dream, thinking about how nightmarish this all was.

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Filed under bathroom, boss, co-workers, confusion, dental, dogs, family, house, teeth, work

Doctor, game, bathroom. work

My brother is playing a video game, but it’s in real life. He’s looking around for collectable monsters to kill. There are several of them and each has 10 you have to find an shoot. The place is this amusement park sized area and we spend a lot of time in the warehouse portion. Then some people show up. I follow the lady and now I’m in a healthcare setting. The problem is an moderate-severe autistic boy in his later teens. He’s a big guy and he’s yelling because he’s scared. I think it’s a specialty dental practice and I’m merely observing them as they try to work on him and treat him. He doesn’t sit long in one area, so they have to follow him throughout the building.

Now it’s my turn to go to the doctor. I call in and they give me an appointment on a Monday. I show up happily and suddenly realize that I forgot to ask them not to schedule me with the doctor I last saw. I see him behind the desk and I groan inwardly, but accept my fate. I take my seat in the crowded waiting room. The lady next to me is friendly and I try not to interact much with other people especially because this is a medical facility. I’m there for quite a while, people coming and going. The lady next to me gets up suddenly and goes up to the front desk exclaiming that the man on the other side of the waiting room has a life threatening illness and needs immediate assistance. I look at him and see that his hands are bleeding from all over like it’s melting. I wonder how the lady knew exactly what the condition was, but decided she’s a nurse or something. I get up to go the bathroom since it’s taking so long. I’m barefoot and the massive bathroom is all wet on the ground. Oh well. I take a stall and sit down to poop. I pull out my phone and start watching a funny video about animals. I’m laughing and apparently playing it loud enough for other poopers to hear. One guy asks me what I’m watching that’s so funny, so I proceed to explain the video as it plays. He laughs along. I finally leave and they’ve been looking for me because they’re ready. I go into the exam room and the doctor is already there. He seems in a much much better mood than when I’d seen him last…almost as if he knew my displeasure from the last time. The visit was rather pleasant as physician visits go.

Then something about work where I’ve finally gone back to work after my break, and I overhear one of my patients complain to another patient that last time he had to see another hygienist and not me. Well, he’s about to see that hygienist again, because once more he’s not on my schedule. A little bit about some patients and those patients.

And my girl starts being annoying so I wake up. It’s raining very hard outside.

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Filed under bathroom, dental, family, Video game, work

Friends, car, enemy, priests, co-workers, animal, bathroom

I think I was in a movie where I was one of the stars or at least the main character group. We were on a special mission. The large squad was driving our armored cars on the route I take to work. It was summer. Just as we were turning at a light up a hill, a massive quadcopter chupped up above us all and the machine transformed so that we could see the 2 operators inside. It was the arch nemesis! The crazy lady! She broadcast her evil plan loudly and then laughed maniacally as the quadcopter flew away. Our mission was set! We all had to try and contain the infection she intended to spread all over the area. The entire team split up and raced off to their destinations to help cover more ground faster. I took my partner and me up the road just a little (it wasn’t a busy suburb anymore, but farm land) and turned down a dirt road where I knew a small rural settlement was. The chance was a bit smaller that she’d infect them, but I had to check because I was responsible for this particular zone. We ride up in our big SUV and it turns out that they were blissfully unaware and were having a festival. I assume it was for the Lunar New Year, given all the Asian stuff being sold there. Our vehicle was too large, but no one batted an eye, so we just “patrolled” like it was routine. As I suspected, there was no evidence of any infection, so we left.

Then, all of the sudden I was walking through a mall. It was getting dark and I was still doing my duty as protector of the area. Nothing really suspicious was going on, but I came upon a very small school-like operation where they were selling stuff as a fundraiser for their group. This group belonged to a friend of mine that I’d never met in person because he’s all the way on the other side of the country. I looked through their stuff and wow, they were really cute! Plushies and neato things, but the price tag was ridiculous. I know they were trying to spin a profit but doggone if I was going to pay $73.99 for a turtle plushie. I just smiled, pretending to consider, and then trying to distract them by asking what the guy was drawing.

Then I had to get up and let Gable out to the bathroom

Now I was in a neighborhood. It was sunny. I kept driving back and forth and back and forth and seeing a setup in front of a house about using corn ethanol as car fuel. The last time I drove by to go somewhere, there were 4 nuns with boxes asking for donations and demonstrating how to create baking soda out of almonds. It was getting dark and I happened to be walking by this time. The 4 nuns were now 4 priests, but not just any priests…dark priests. You knew they were dark because their cossacks were a deep purple. Each priest had an animal affiliation. Something bad happened and now I was in  building. There had been a murder or something atrocious and I was standing in front of the scene of the crime. With the lights on, the room wasn’t particularly exciting, just stone walls, some torches, stone floors, some wooden chairs. The priests seemed innocent, just doing their religious normal. We all left and stood in front of the room. Someone turned off the lights of the room to save energy and there was a group of 5 standing with me there. I had my headlamp on, because I guess I was an investigator? The 5 people were probably my coworkers, but where just shadowy, detail-less entities, except one of them who was my newest co-worker. She asked me if I noticed anything weird and how the investigation was going. I happened to look into the dark room with my headlamp shining and realized something crazy! I told E to look into the room with me (trying to shine around the others who were standing still and blocking the way) and when I moved my headlamp around, the light would reflect a shining purple on images on the stone wall. There was also a suspect lectern in the corner! The large shining image was that of a wolf-head!!! Gosh darn that was one of the priests’ affiliation animals!!! They flipped the light back on and restarted the investigation, closing the door this time. I suspected that there would be more murders in each of the priests’ respective ritual chambers.

But for now, I needed to go pee, so I opened the door and closed it behind me. There on the floor was either a sloth or some such animal crawling on the floor. It snagged it’s claw on my foot which hurt a lot, but it was just a cute animal. Unbeknownst to me, it was one of the priests in animal form… I popped into the bathroom and sat down and peed on the toilet (I hate bathroom dreams). As I was going, I see the claw of the animal reaching under the door and trying to lift the door up. Now I was getting freaked out, but I couldn’t stop peeing! It squeezed it’s body under the door and reaching maliciously out towards me (still peeing). I FREAKED OUT, but couldn’t stop peeing. I was almost done, but it was also mostly in the small bathroom!! Finally I yelled for someone and someone opened the door just as I had jumped up off the toilet and trying to pull up my underwear. When the door was opened, the creature pretended to be innocent and harmless again.

–That’s when I jolted awake because I was late.

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Filed under animals, bathroom, car, co-workers, fear, friends, mission

Bathroom, School, friend, video game

First Dream of 2019!

…of course it had to be bathroom dreams.

I really have to poop. I’m outside on the campus of a large workplace or school or institution. There are lots of other people out there. Right outside under the awning of an imposing building, I find my toilet. My toilet. The one I installed there. I set my fuzzy dog bed down on the ground, the one with all of my junk on it and prepare to poop on my toilet. It’s comfortable. It’s mine. It’s out in the open, just like everyone else’s. It’s not as extravagant or expensive as some, but it’s better than half of the commodes in the vicinity and with good location too! Under an awning! I’m getting a little nervous since there are so many other people on their toilets at the same time, but what can you do? I banter with a girl across the way, and give a verbal nod to Keanu Reeves chilling diagonally from me in his hot tub/commode. He smiles, completely relaxed and shifts in his warm tub. I wonder if he’s bathing or toileting, but then I’m done. The toilet paper stand seemed to have moved on its own, so I pick up my commode while sitting on it and movie it over a little until I can reach the TP. I’m concerned that I’ll break the plumbing, but it seems to be flexible and holding on just fine. To my irritation, the paper is extremely thin and cheap, so I get double and start wiping. Here comes the embarrassment again, knowing that everyone’s watching me, and of course since the paper is so cheapo, I sticks and breaks and gets all over my hands. Ugh. I hurry to move my stuff away and find a sink to wash, but my dog bed full of junk is too heavy to carry with one arm. I start throwing away the more worthless stuff (all of it is lacking in value, broken things) and finally can hoist the bed onto my head and shoulders, well aware that my hands are disgusting.

I make my way inside with an old college friend. The building is an Academy. A very old school that apparently we used to go to (very unfamiliar to me). We walk past the large reception area and see that the auditorium just let out. All we want to do is find a bathroom since now I need to pee really badly. With the efflux of students, the bathroom there is extremely full and there’s a line to use it. My friend said we should try the other bathrooms. I let her lead because this is all unfamiliar to me and she seemed to know where she was going. We wander this way and that, each bathroom full, going down hallways that just end suddenly and having to backtrack. Finally, we end up in a quad of sorts in the middle of the school with TWO bathrooms. I was like, YESSS. Unfortunately the previous bathroom lines had followed us. I set my dog bed down against the far wall next to a classroom that was fully green on the inside. By the time I get back to the bathrooms, the line has died down tremendously. We go into the one on the right side and right away I realize that these bathrooms are co-ed. It doesn’t bother me because I just needed to pee, like yesterday. The toilets in there are jammed in and very strange: everything is stainless steel. My friend ditches me for the right side of the bathroom, and leaves me with one of the stranger, reclining toilets. Once again, I put aside my bewilderedness so I can use it. Suddenly my one reclining toilet turned into 3 side by side like a roller coaster. There was a seat and these two leg flumes with running water. Effectively, you’d sit inside this running water. The sign in front of each seat said to pull down your pants and sit on it, because if you stand over it, the water won’t get warm. I was thinking about doing that, but darn it, I want that warmness. With a shrug, I turn to pull down my pants and sit in the water of the middle seat. On my left is a guy already sitting on his and the other units are full. Lo and behold, the water DOES get warm and quickly. I’m in the back row of the toilet units and in front of each column (there are 3 columns, each with about 3-4 rows) is a large TV screen. I see it’s a movie or footage of some ships shooting. The ships keeps dying though, so I grab onto the handles right in front of me and start hitting buttons. It works!!! I keep trying to tell everyone that it’s a video game, but no one wants to control it, so I do. I’m maneuvering, shooting and playing through the level and at that point everyone is enraptured with my playing. I’m sitting there, playing this arcade-like game and thinking, wow this is the best bathroom ever, with video game to play or watch as you do your thing, on a heated water toilet! I yell over at my brother on the far right column to join me as a 2P, but I don’t know if he hears me. I’m now onto a boss fight, trying to outmaneuver the missiles and rockets while attempting to hit the green square weakpoints of the large, massive robot. People are cheering me on and it’s so hard, I need a 2nd player.

Then suddenly it was over, and everyone gets up to leave. I finally find a sink and soap to wash my hands and go to retrieve my dog bed My friend and I walk up the narrow wooden staircase. She stops suddenly to pick up some pieces of wood from the staircase. I’m worried because the slats are coming apart, but she informed me that she placed them there and needed to take them home to build something. She makes her way out of the door where I’m waiting and I hoist my dog bed and off we go.

–Then I wake up because I’ve overslept an hour.

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Filed under bathroom, friends, school, Video game