Category Archives: bathroom

Friends, car, enemy, priests, co-workers, animal, bathroom

I think I was in a movie where I was one of the stars or at least the main character group. We were on a special mission. The large squad was driving our armored cars on the route I take to work. It was summer. Just as we were turning at a light up a hill, a massive quadcopter chupped up above us all and the machine transformed so that we could see the 2 operators inside. It was the arch nemesis! The crazy lady! She broadcast her evil plan loudly and then laughed maniacally as the quadcopter flew away. Our mission was set! We all had to try and contain the infection she intended to spread all over the area. The entire team split up and raced off to their destinations to help cover more ground faster. I took my partner and me up the road just a little (it wasn’t a busy suburb anymore, but farm land) and turned down a dirt road where I knew a small rural settlement was. The chance was a bit smaller that she’d infect them, but I had to check because I was responsible for this particular zone. We ride up in our big SUV and it turns out that they were blissfully unaware and were having a festival. I assume it was for the Lunar New Year, given all the Asian stuff being sold there. Our vehicle was too large, but no one batted an eye, so we just “patrolled” like it was routine. As I suspected, there was no evidence of any infection, so we left.

Then, all of the sudden I was walking through a mall. It was getting dark and I was still doing my duty as protector of the area. Nothing really suspicious was going on, but I came upon a very small school-like operation where they were selling stuff as a fundraiser for their group. This group belonged to a friend of mine that I’d never met in person because he’s all the way on the other side of the country. I looked through their stuff and wow, they were really cute! Plushies and neato things, but the price tag was ridiculous. I know they were trying to spin a profit but doggone if I was going to pay $73.99 for a turtle plushie. I just smiled, pretending to consider, and then trying to distract them by asking what the guy was drawing.

Then I had to get up and let Gable out to the bathroom

Now I was in a neighborhood. It was sunny. I kept driving back and forth and back and forth and seeing a setup in front of a house about using corn ethanol as car fuel. The last time I drove by to go somewhere, there were 4 nuns with boxes asking for donations and demonstrating how to create baking soda out of almonds. It was getting dark and I happened to be walking by this time. The 4 nuns were now 4 priests, but not just any priests…dark priests. You knew they were dark because their cossacks were a deep purple. Each priest had an animal affiliation. Something bad happened and now I was in  building. There had been a murder or something atrocious and I was standing in front of the scene of the crime. With the lights on, the room wasn’t particularly exciting, just stone walls, some torches, stone floors, some wooden chairs. The priests seemed innocent, just doing their religious normal. We all left and stood in front of the room. Someone turned off the lights of the room to save energy and there was a group of 5 standing with me there. I had my headlamp on, because I guess I was an investigator? The 5 people were probably my coworkers, but where just shadowy, detail-less entities, except one of them who was my newest co-worker. She asked me if I noticed anything weird and how the investigation was going. I happened to look into the dark room with my headlamp shining and realized something crazy! I told E to look into the room with me (trying to shine around the others who were standing still and blocking the way) and when I moved my headlamp around, the light would reflect a shining purple on images on the stone wall. There was also a suspect lectern in the corner! The large shining image was that of a wolf-head!!! Gosh darn that was one of the priests’ affiliation animals!!! They flipped the light back on and restarted the investigation, closing the door this time. I suspected that there would be more murders in each of the priests’ respective ritual chambers.

But for now, I needed to go pee, so I opened the door and closed it behind me. There on the floor was either a sloth or some such animal crawling on the floor. It snagged it’s claw on my foot which hurt a lot, but it was just a cute animal. Unbeknownst to me, it was one of the priests in animal form… I popped into the bathroom and sat down and peed on the toilet (I hate bathroom dreams). As I was going, I see the claw of the animal reaching under the door and trying to lift the door up. Now I was getting freaked out, but I couldn’t stop peeing! It squeezed it’s body under the door and reaching maliciously out towards me (still peeing). I FREAKED OUT, but couldn’t stop peeing. I was almost done, but it was also mostly in the small bathroom!! Finally I yelled for someone and someone opened the door just as I had jumped up off the toilet and trying to pull up my underwear. When the door was opened, the creature pretended to be innocent and harmless again.

–That’s when I jolted awake because I was late.

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Filed under animals, bathroom, car, co-workers, fear, friends, mission

Bathroom, School, friend, video game

First Dream of 2019!

…of course it had to be bathroom dreams.

I really have to poop. I’m outside on the campus of a large workplace or school or institution. There are lots of other people out there. Right outside under the awning of an imposing building, I find my toilet. My toilet. The one I installed there. I set my fuzzy dog bed down on the ground, the one with all of my junk on it and prepare to poop on my toilet. It’s comfortable. It’s mine. It’s out in the open, just like everyone else’s. It’s not as extravagant or expensive as some, but it’s better than half of the commodes in the vicinity and with good location too! Under an awning! I’m getting a little nervous since there are so many other people on their toilets at the same time, but what can you do? I banter with a girl across the way, and give a verbal nod to Keanu Reeves chilling diagonally from me in his hot tub/commode. He smiles, completely relaxed and shifts in his warm tub. I wonder if he’s bathing or toileting, but then I’m done. The toilet paper stand seemed to have moved on its own, so I pick up my commode while sitting on it and movie it over a little until I can reach the TP. I’m concerned that I’ll break the plumbing, but it seems to be flexible and holding on just fine. To my irritation, the paper is extremely thin and cheap, so I get double and start wiping. Here comes the embarrassment again, knowing that everyone’s watching me, and of course since the paper is so cheapo, I sticks and breaks and gets all over my hands. Ugh. I hurry to move my stuff away and find a sink to wash, but my dog bed full of junk is too heavy to carry with one arm. I start throwing away the more worthless stuff (all of it is lacking in value, broken things) and finally can hoist the bed onto my head and shoulders, well aware that my hands are disgusting.

I make my way inside with an old college friend. The building is an Academy. A very old school that apparently we used to go to (very unfamiliar to me). We walk past the large reception area and see that the auditorium just let out. All we want to do is find a bathroom since now I need to pee really badly. With the efflux of students, the bathroom there is extremely full and there’s a line to use it. My friend said we should try the other bathrooms. I let her lead because this is all unfamiliar to me and she seemed to know where she was going. We wander this way and that, each bathroom full, going down hallways that just end suddenly and having to backtrack. Finally, we end up in a quad of sorts in the middle of the school with TWO bathrooms. I was like, YESSS. Unfortunately the previous bathroom lines had followed us. I set my dog bed down against the far wall next to a classroom that was fully green on the inside. By the time I get back to the bathrooms, the line has died down tremendously. We go into the one on the right side and right away I realize that these bathrooms are co-ed. It doesn’t bother me because I just needed to pee, like yesterday. The toilets in there are jammed in and very strange: everything is stainless steel. My friend ditches me for the right side of the bathroom, and leaves me with one of the stranger, reclining toilets. Once again, I put aside my bewilderedness so I can use it. Suddenly my one reclining toilet turned into 3 side by side like a roller coaster. There was a seat and these two leg flumes with running water. Effectively, you’d sit inside this running water. The sign in front of each seat said to pull down your pants and sit on it, because if you stand over it, the water won’t get warm. I was thinking about doing that, but darn it, I want that warmness. With a shrug, I turn to pull down my pants and sit in the water of the middle seat. On my left is a guy already sitting on his and the other units are full. Lo and behold, the water DOES get warm and quickly. I’m in the back row of the toilet units and in front of each column (there are 3 columns, each with about 3-4 rows) is a large TV screen. I see it’s a movie or footage of some ships shooting. The ships keeps dying though, so I grab onto the handles right in front of me and start hitting buttons. It works!!! I keep trying to tell everyone that it’s a video game, but no one wants to control it, so I do. I’m maneuvering, shooting and playing through the level and at that point everyone is enraptured with my playing. I’m sitting there, playing this arcade-like game and thinking, wow this is the best bathroom ever, with video game to play or watch as you do your thing, on a heated water toilet! I yell over at my brother on the far right column to join me as a 2P, but I don’t know if he hears me. I’m now onto a boss fight, trying to outmaneuver the missiles and rockets while attempting to hit the green square weakpoints of the large, massive robot. People are cheering me on and it’s so hard, I need a 2nd player.

Then suddenly it was over, and everyone gets up to leave. I finally find a sink and soap to wash my hands and go to retrieve my dog bed My friend and I walk up the narrow wooden staircase. She stops suddenly to pick up some pieces of wood from the staircase. I’m worried because the slats are coming apart, but she informed me that she placed them there and needed to take them home to build something. She makes her way out of the door where I’m waiting and I hoist my dog bed and off we go.

–Then I wake up because I’ve overslept an hour.

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Filed under bathroom, friends, school, Video game

Work, bathroom, delay

I’ve been having many and vivid dreams, but I can’t seem to remember them long enough to blog about them. Mostly because I’m a fool and for some reason keep going through my Facebook newsfeed. That stuff will make you paranoid, idiotic and empty-brained.

The other day I was dreaming about work. Again. The building used to be a prison or a school or medical office or something. There were operatories, but then there were full on rooms too with toilets inside of them. I was waiting for an exam or had just finished one, except that I really really had to pee. I wandered over to one of the full setup rooms since they are rarely used. In one room, I pretended to inspect everything while trying to decide if I should just go ahead and use the toilet. I walked over to the 2nd door (which is blocked off and not usable) and pulled aside the curtain on the door window. It overlooks the reception area, but more interestingly there is a mesh of metal inside the window. I say to myself, man, this place is like a prison, and turn around just in time to see one of my bosses come in. She’s about to use the place. She tells someone outside to bring a particular patient into the room, and then busies herself getting everything ready. She looks at me, wondering why I’m here and not seeing my patient and I smile and head out of the room, going into the other full setup op like I’m just looking for something. I am beyond relieved that I hadn’t decided to pee in that room after all.

Instead, I head over to get my patient. He and another man are standing in the farm part of the office, on the other side of a small, low wooden fence in the hay. They are wearing guard armor. I walk up to them, tackle the man with my patient until he lay on the ground and then proceed to pee on him. My patient, the other guard reels back in surprise and just kind of stares at me while I “kill” his buddy. I glare up at him like he’s next.

WTH

One of my online friend’s flight was very delayed yesterday as he was trying to go home. I dreamed, then, that it was delayed 3 months. He was laughing while exclaiming this and I couldn’t understand why he was laughing instead of being upset about it all.

Other dream snippets are on the edges of my memory, but I can’t seem to recall the details.

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Filed under bathroom, work

Mail Lady

Haven’t been sleeping well because of my puppy girl. There’s only one dream I remember from last night, though and it’s only a snippet of it.

We were at a house I don’t recognize, but I lived there with my mom and it was just as messy as usual. Especially my room and bathroom. We’re just going about our business and the mail lady is making her rounds. We can see and hear it. The neighborhood is nice and friendly and there are no mail boxes, you put it outside of your door and she drives around looking for them. I have a letter that needs to go out because it’s important so we set mine and my mom’s by the door and continue to prepare for work. As we’re going about doing things, the mail lady comes traipsing inside. She just takes a random tour of the house by herself and I’m sitting there hoping she doesn’t go into my bathroom. We leave her to her own devices and I happen to go upstairs and find her, of course, in my bathroom, using the sink. She doesn’t seem to mind the mess much and tells me about her daughter who is also messy. I leave and later she comes down to the kitchen where she starts to complain about her teeth. Suddenly I’m looking in her mouth as a clinician, maybe doing a cleaning, but definitely looking. She has 4 molars on the upper left and I start getting confused the more I count because she seems to have supernumeraries all over. Then I find a draining fistula and she all but flips out because she doesn’t want to go to the dentist. They told her before that something needs to be done, but she doesn’t want to and now doesn’t want to believe me. I try to show her in the mirror and she about loses it again. She pretty much tries to run from me out the door and I yell after her to go see a dentist and get an x-ray!!!

That’s it.

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Filed under bathroom, dental, teeth

Poop, pee, construction, beach, bug, lots of people

I haaaate bathroom dreams. Uuugh.

I’m driving by myself to the beach. No one is in the car with me and I’m just chillin’, but when I get there it’s amazing to see that many of the roads are closed off. I pretty much know how to get the house regardless, but I turn my GPS on anyways just in case. It’s kind of like a ghost town with just the locals wandering around on foot and cars. There are flooded streets and trees down, but my car has no trouble getting through that. It’s harder to navigate around the people milling around.

Then I’m not in my car anymore. I’m walking, having reached my destination. I guess there’s not much to do on the beach, so I decide I’m going to go work on the weeds that have collected in between the rubble of two buildings. I’d passed them on the way in, so I head over there now. It’s now not the beach, but a post-apocalyptic type of place. It’s going to be hard work, so I set up a boombox speaker for music and use it. Then all of the sudden, I can’t do that anymore because they’re shooting a movie in one of the abandoned buildings. I’m OK with that, wandering around rubble, when I realize that I’d left my music over there and they have to listen to it. It had been on a timer so it cut on every day from 7am to 5pm. You can hear and see the actor pretend to fall out of the parking garage, alongside my music. I eventually am able to go back to where I was living, also rubble. The room parts are OK, just a corner of the house is destroyed. I’m so happy to be able to sleep on my bed again. I look in to see that I’d been sharing the room with my sister. Some guy lives in one of the rooms down the hall. I had to pee really badly, so I find a large plastic container and decide I can use that, classical music coming in from outside. There are no doors and one of the walls is missing, but I don’t care much. Just as I was about to use it, my sister comes in. Ugh. I start gathering my stuff when suddenly it’s time we moved into a different home.

This home is fully functional and not destroyed, but it seems that it used to be a bar lounge. It’s currently empty of furniture, though. I have to live here with a bunch of other people, but my sister is there too. Everyone kind of knows each other (even though I don’t recognize anyone) so everyone is comfortable. There are tons of plants on the windowsill and I’m cold, so I go to close all of the windows to save heat. Everyone starts freaking out about their plants and I say, just leave them on the outside sill (made of brick) where they can get rain and sun and we can keep our heat inside. My sister grabs her special plants and takes them away. I’m like, whatever. While I’m trying to look around, a bee or wasp has gotten inside because of the plants and I’m freaking out. Everyone is laughing or not caring and I try not to, but the darn thing keeps following me around and landing on me.

Finally with everyone safe, I’ve been having to go to the bathroom forever. I head down to the basement. Everyone has set up several different “toilets.” They’re literally all ceramic cookie jar things with holes in it. I pick some up (ew) and examine them, trying to figure out how in the world I’d be able to use them. Then I see a larger one that has been unopened, so I undo the plastic wrap and look inside. This woman appears, sitting on one of the other ones and says, “yeah I wouldn’t eat that.” I re-examine the advertisement I’d ripped off the “toilet” and it implies that you can eat the cookies after you use the bathroom. Inside the top is a wrapped bag of brown cookies. I’m like, what? The lady just nods and laughs and I look in the lower part to see it is full of shredded mozzarella. I give her a quizzical look, but just shrug and get ready to poop since I really really have to go.

It cuts here to me back in that shared bedroom, looking for the pee container again. Apparently I hadn’t been back for a while and it was deserted there now. I find the container and now there are spider webs everywhere and I don’t really want to try and pee amidst spiders, so I work to remove the webs. There are 2 spiders in 2 different webs, so I return to my mom’s house to ask for a container. It looks suspiciously like the house I left down South. We’re moving back in apparently, so everything’s a mess. She’s not helpful at all, so I finally find some and go back to move the spiders. Finally, I can pee in peace. Relieved, then I see that the room is so unkempt, so I randomly decide to make the beds. There are some thin, old blankets to be used!

Cut back to the basement because I remembered I have to poop still. Another lady has shown up and they start whooping, telling me to “yeaaaah! Pull those blue panties down!” I’m mildly embarrassed, but whatever, in this time and place I guess this is how it is. Turns out, I was wearing pants, and my blue panties and for some reason black hiking shorts with the panty sling inside. Weird. I sit down to poop in the thing, trying not to fall inside, but then everyone in the housing unit comes spilling into the room, kids and all. I become very embarrassed and sink into it, but I HAVE TO GO SO BAD, so I keep trying to hurry it up without making grunting noises or anything, lest those ladies laugh at me again. However, it won’t come out of my butt, no matter how hard I try. It gets stuck halfway like there’s a block and I’m so humiliated with all the people around and I don’t know what to do, and where is the toilet paper and–

–I wake up. Turns out I’d had a wedgie while sleeping. UUUUUUGGGH

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Filed under bathroom, beach, embarrass, food, music

water, plane, bears, hideaway, dog, bridge, sweetgum tree

Wow what a night!

On the edge of a wood near suburbia, some other person and I were exploring and began building a hideaway system that ran for several miles. It was mostly made of wood and started small, but it kept getting bigger in some spots. So, basically it was a series of tunnels, or fortified walkways that linked bigger room-type spaces. The danger aspect wasn’t too bad as we were out near the woods, but it was present. The beginning of the project was scarier than the later because by the end of the project we were very confident in our skills and supplies. You could see between the slats in the wood, but we had all the amenities inside like rugs, counters, chairs, couches, food, etc. There was even a dog that came by and eventually became ours. It was a Corgi-like dog and I didn’t want to keep it at first because dogs make noise and would attract danger, but this dog was great and I spent a lot of time playing with it while it was lying on its back. At an expansion point, we threw open the wooden wall onto hinges and were about to build a new set of tunnels.

Then I was walking around in some water. It was a lake and the water came up to around my knees or so, maybe deeper in some spots, but you could see the bottom for the most part. I was going after some pieces of beef jerky littering the floor of the lake. My mom wanted to find some good meat for the dogs. I waded in after her just to be close enough in the event I was needed, but soon, I found something interesting: a beef jerky/large tree branch with an axe stuck to one end of it. I pulled it out of the water for a closer look and the axe didn’t come with it, but I laughed out loud at what I saw on it. My brother happened to have walked up to me at that point and I showed him the tiny little crab sitting on it, no doubt having dropped the axe it was carrying. It was fascinating and absurd at the same time. We put it back in the water, it grabbed ahold of its axe again and the piece of wood continued to move along the water. I followed the path, using my phone to record it all. Then I wanted a picture and had my brother pick it up again while I snapped a few photos of the crab which didn’t like having its picture taken.

We then get to later, when my coworker friend took me to a different lake and we waded into that. She said that I should sit down in the water and cool off with her, and I was like, beh, I don’t want to, but then I fell and ended up in the water anyways. She laughed and said, well there you go and I was irritated. Oh well, so I get into the water and it started raining or having some crazy weather/ water thing going on. I don’t know what possessed me to swim to the other end of the lake, but then the event started getting BAD and I was getting sucked into an A/C unit that was pulling in the overflowing water towards itself in torrents. My sister grabbed me and rescued me, as apparently she was a better swimmer, and I tried to help by pushing off with my tippy toes on the bottom of the lake since I was taller and with bigger leg muscles.

Then I was on a plane. Or at least I think it was a plane, some sort of transportation with strange seating. It was late, too, and there were business men traveling home. I guess it wasn’t too crowded so 3 of the men asked if they could stretch out and lay down to sleep during the trip. The attendant was flustered and didn’t know how to manage all of these people being rude and worrying about the other passengers. I offered my own advice to the logistics of using the seats as beds, but people just stared at me. I moved to my place which happened to be on the other side of a weird, large pillow barrier with a smiley face or some other cutesy design on it. Unfortunately, the little alcove there seated 4 and I had to be near these 2 babies. Evil. Babies. A male and female, that had the faces of adults and were maliciously singing with each other about how they were planning to use their baby statuses and genius brains to destroy people. The male one was saying that he looked like a girl, so people would be unassuming around him and honestly it was all a bit inappropriate and lewd. In the middle of their singing I got up to use the bathroom because I really had to go, but I could still hear their singing and planning.

Now I’m driving around near some suspension bridges, a rerun dream of sorts. In this one, I needed to keep Guan Yu alive, which I had failed the last time I tried this, so instead of turning right, we took a left. The Guan Yu character stopped, and I could clearly see the sniper hiding in the trees, waiting for him. I parked his car and my car around him to try and block any sniper attack, and found some other people to move their cars around him too. I could tell that this time I was successful in preventing his death for a little longer at least….

…then I woke up to use the bathroom because my bladder was about to burst.

Back in bed and back into dreamland, now I’m dreaming about the We Bare Bears. Grizz and Panda. I didn’t see Ice Bear anywhere. We were walking along in a forest and then had to stay overnight in a cabin. I showed them to their rooms and Grizz was really gung ho about everything. When we woke up the next morning to continue our adventure, Grizz started to get dizzy and weak because he was so hungry. My operator told me to look for birch trees because the sugar in the bark was exactly what Grizz needed, but there were no birch trees around and this was an emergency. Suddenly, Grizz fell over onto his back and I looked up to see a sweetgum tree! The leaves and gumballs were so high up, but we started fashioning slingshots and shooting at the tree. Somehow I got rubberbands and shared them with the bears. The slingshot escapade turned into a defense instead of retrieval of young gumballs and it was rather fun. I was using 3 rubber bands and smashing some bugs with them, the best shot of the three.

Then. WAKE UP TIME.

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Filed under animals, bathroom, car, co-workers, mission, water

Portal, pickup, family, bathroom, vaccines

I’m driving up and down this road some of it is in traffic. The weather changes from pouring rain to sun to humid and buggy. One moment I’m sitting there and in another instant I’m desperately trying to escape a bug attack or some other thing chasing me. My brother jumps in to help and I complain that how come a bee is always attacking me! I could feel it land on the back of my neck, and I think it got stuck in my clothes, but I didn’t end up getting stung at all. Something about houses that are mostly pillaged and picked clean.

Then I’m on the phone calling 2 different Target Pharmacies to ask them if they have the egg-less vaccines. The condition of the world has become dangerous, but thankfully scientists have developed and approved for release a myriad of vaccines for maladies such as Lyme, Ehrlichiosis, Rocky Mountain spotted fever, flu, etc. I was eager to have the vaccines especially with the egg-free thing! One pharmacy said they do and the other did not. I managed to get to one of them where I sat down at a table and started doing something to get a prescription filled. Then when I asked about “those vaccines” they informed me that I had the wrong pharmacy and it was the one further away. Disappointed, I wander off.

And back to my place which is in a mountainous, arid location. The building looks a bit run down, but it’s home….or is it work? Either way it doesn’t matter because I’m SUPER excited about driving my new pickup truck. It was impressive to own given the state of the world we lived in. The paint was chipped and rust evident in many areas, most notably the back trunk door. The bed was kind of neato as it was split into two areas, the larger, deeper area in the back and a more shallow “quick-access” area towards the front. It had an access cab, not quite a full cab, but ample room for some passengers. Despite the looks, it ran very well. I was supposed to give my coworker a ride and she was a bit excited too. She climbed up from the back bed to the shallow part, dropped her backpack and then made her way into the passenger seat. I smiled to myself, threw my own backpack in the shallow end and got into the driver seat. Off we went.

I ended up at a park of sorts with my immediate family. Still in a gray, rather dreary world. I’m not sure what kind of attraction it was, but it was exciting given the state of things. We were walking and I was trying to get them to the main attraction which was to be a portal. I had been needing desperately to pee, but I figured I’d just hold it until the trip was over. Unfortunately, I couldn’t make it that far, so when we finally got to where the portal was, I had someone hold my jacket? object? and said I’d be back after a pit stop. I ran in, not sure what happened to my pants, still wearing underwear, but I hoped no one could see that it was already leaking out everywhere. I ran into one of the stalls and half stood over the bowl, but at this point it was worthless to pull the undies down because I was basically peeing through my underwear. It didn’t matter too much because I really needed this. My bladder was going to burst! There was a lot of talking going on from other visitors in the spacious bathroom (at least 15 stalls!). I grabbed the toilet paper to wipe as much as I could and pulled up my pants, hoping no one would notice the wetness, and cringing at the thought of having to wear peed-on clothing. To my delight, it was not uncomfortable at all–in fact, it seemed to have already dried back to normal. Then the lights went out. It came back on and woman rushes in yelling to everyone that the park was closing, everyone needed to leave! People expressed dismay and she explained that she was closing the park because a really fat woman demanded that she wanted her dental implant placed TOMORROW and that was just impossible and a ridiculous request. Everyone now needed to go home. Apparently that was a legitimate complaint, so with much grumbling everyone moved to leave. I went out to my family and explained the situation, thinking that I knew what fat lady she was referring to. We were so close, though! The portal! The lights kept dimming and coming back on, no doubt to signal the close of the park. Another park goer guy and I were staring at the portal, and considering whether we should go in. We caught each other’s eyes and silently agreed to just do it! We came all this way after all! I told my family we’re going to get in the portal quickly, so we do. There were two options and I chose the first option. We end up in a top floor of a small building where there was a funeral going on. I wandered into the food room, but there were only 2 weird looking dishes, so I decide to gather my family and leave, but they’re having fun looking at the dead body. There’s also the push of needing to leave the park before we get stuck in the portal…I go to grab my mom, when–

–I wake up because my bladder really is going to burst in real life, but I don’t want to get up.

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Filed under bathroom, car, co-workers, family

Date, alligators, friend, neighborhood, dental

I walk into what’s supposed to be my house only to find to my horror that it was completely overrun by alligators. They were mostly small alligators but alligators nonetheless. Gators mixed with another animal that I now can’t remember but were relatively harmless, small and cute. I’m thinking small hippos but I could be wrong. Anyways, I have to fix the problem so I start picking up the nicer hippos and trying to pick up the small gators and putting them into containers, but they’re mean! And I’m scared!

Cut to some dream about 2 adult males and a woman…all interested in each other, love triangle, back and forth a some skin showing but nothing overtly graphic.

Then I’m walking around in my (unfamiliar) neighborhood. The foot traffic is tremendous here! I notice little details about my neighbors and find that I have an old friend from HS living nearby with her sister. Obviously her parents have moved and left the house to their kids. That’s really nice, I think to myself. I study the people wandering around and then I head back to my place because its dark out. Yet more gators. Just gators this time. I’m exasperated and start putting them in containers again but this time they’re even meaner and so I’m like, nope, and walk out of the house. I end up sitting on a covered, carpeted staircase that is part of the sidewalk and peeing because I can’t navigate the house. Just as I thought I was clear I hear people using the stairs behind me and something nudge my back. Turns out it’s a little dog, so trying to buy myself time to finish peeing so I can get out of the way of the dogwalker and her mom, I start petting it. Weirdly its face looks creepily like its owner’s face so I comment on that light heartedly and also notice that even their teeth misalignment is similar. Strange. But I’ve finished peeing and successfully distracted them so I run off.

That’s when I end up in a car with an old suitor. He’s taking me on a date to DC. He’s also wearing a nice suit and I’m just in my usual casual stuff. He’s very controlling and adamant about us doing things. Honestly, I know he’s got a happy relationship and I’m currently not interested in one, so I didn’t want to go but he was VERY insistent, so I go. We get out of the car, it’s nighttime, and he goes straight for this one tourist place. It’s like a museum, but like an acting museum if you will? So we’re in there and I’m enjoying myself, taking in everything (I LOVE museums) as the nerd that I am,  and we come up on an exhibit. They’re showing us something and I’m up front and I’m freaking out because it’s TINIEST little animal (there are other animals too…gators….what is up with the gators? But this critter is just adorable)!!!! I’m down looking at it, marveling at it (there’s a small crowd behind us that is the tour group we’re with), up close and personal. He’s there too, looking, but all of the sudden he tells me that he’s bored, so let’s leave. I’m like, guh, but he’s my ride so what am I supposed to do. I get up and leave with him with everyone else looking at us in disbelief. I try I hid my face because I’m embarrassed. We leave and I’ve had just about enough of him. The night life there is very busy as if there is a festival going on. He starts walking around and yelling at me to come with him we’re going to cross over into Maryland! However, I’m about ready to call a taxi or something to take me home because this is NOT the guy I remember! He goes off to look for food and I purposefully lag behind and run into my good childhood friend. We walk together for a bit and she sees the whole guy-being-a-jerk-thing, and informs me that this is not a good thing. I tell her that I’m well aware and wish I could get out of it. Suddenly I run to catch up with crazy guy and this older lady follows me. Some sort of insanity ensues with someone on the ground. If it was me or him I can’t remember, but I do remember the older lady following me saves me and wants to whisk me home through the air. I guess she’s a witch? Well I don’t remember what happens next, because I wake up.

Nap-Dream (I greatly dislike taking naps because they make me more tired, cranky and I can’t ever wake up):

I was at work and had come in late. It was hot and stuffy and dark. Sleep had not come well for me that night, so I was ridiculously tired; so much so that I hadn’t even bothered to put on my clinic jacket and had it wrapped around my neck. I sat down at my computer and saw that my first patient hadn’t arrived even though I was late. Thank goodness for that. I start playing Candy Crush on my phone while trying to stay awake, and hadn’t even bothered to go ask about my patient. Stuff is being said and things are happening around me and I keep telling myself I have to wake up, but I can’t. Suddenly, I jolt awake and realize that I’ve been napping and my next patient might be here! My brain doesn’t work right and I keep flipping through the schedule at work trying to find the right day. Why hadn’t anyone come to tell me what’s going on?? I’m going to be in so much trouble! I hear different voices coming from the front desk and my coworker comes back and I’m freaking out because I still don’t know which schedule is correct, my brain still will not wake up! My coworkers are giving me “you’re being lazy and weird” looks and I’m afraid to ask them which schedule is correct. My patient has been sitting quietly in the waiting room and I try to call her back but I got the name wrong. Wake up! WAKE UP!

That’s when I really do wake up and find that I’ve been napping for 1.5 hours. I hate naps. 

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Filed under animals, bathroom, date, dental, fear, house

Shower, dragons, dogs

Dreams can be hard to record because it’s difficult to go backwards in chronology and remember it to make a decent, coherent account. I remember it from end to beginning which would be too difficult to read.

I was living in this very mature community with lots of green space and greens while still housing a large amount of people. It was quiet. I seem to have been caring for my grandpa’s new dog, a young, energetic pup, a girl, alongside my own. It was only supposed to be for the weekend. Well, I go do something, perhaps take a nap, and look out front in the gated entrance area to the house (wrought iron fence with large gate). That’s when I FREAK OUT because my boy and my grandpa’s girl are not there. All that was left were a pile of what appeared to be feathers? Or just really soft, downy fur. My own girl was still chillin’ inside the house, and I start berating my mom about why she put the dogs out there without supervision and didn’t let them in, but I’m beside myself because I think it was my own fault and not anyone else’s. I can just picture their little faces standing at the door wanting in, but no one knowing. They probably started barking and then lured in by the noise, the dragon took them. The dragon. It all seems completely futile now, but I am convinced that I can fix this! I run outside to any of the green spaces to see where the dragon could have taken them to try and eat them. In my brain the prospect of finding them alive still is good and maybe I can just beat off the dragon, I don’t know, but it just has to be that way! The leftover Feathers/fur seemed extremely fresh, like still warm! Where, oh WHERE have my little dogs gone??? I run home in distress because I can’t find them and have no clue where to start. My mom is on the phone with my grandpa who wants to come pick up the dog because their trip was cut short, but she makes some excuse and tells them to come back in a couple days. I resolve to travel in a quest to find the dragon and make it pay for what it did. It was night time, but it was duty to do this, so I left home and headed to the ocean in the distance because across that is where I have to go.

When I arrive at the location objective, I’m inside a big wholesale club. The coordinates were correct for the place, so I start looking around and see that they have some water access points at the back of the store (think fish farm type things), but obviously I can’t just jump into them even though I know that’s where I’m supposed to go. I see a girl checking out some people, so I go up to her and ask a few unobtrusive questions to see what the security level is like and what I can possibly glean from her. She’s extremely friendly and we start talking about teeth and her and I ask her where she’s staying. The company is paying her and the team of workers to stay in their facility housing unit. Ah hah. There is some sort of dastardly plan going on here. She directs me to one of the tanks.

Then stuff happens that I can’t remember and suddenly I’m living in the said housing unit. Going undercover, I guess. At that moment in time I’m trying to go take a shower, having just established myself into the enemy company’s graces to become part of their team. I start training the next day, so it’s just acclimation time. I walk into the bathroom and there are 2 people there laughing at a stool display (it’s pretty opulent) which they kind of break and put back quickly before leaving. It’s a single bathroom, but then my sister and some other person is in there having a nice conversation. That cashier girl shows up all of the sudden as I’m about to jump into the shower and I ask her how’s it going. Apparently it has been some time since I’d last met her. She told me that her dentistry (ortho) was all finished now, and I was like, awesome, let me see! As I look at it, she says that it turns out that she has this conditioni where there are teeth growing out from the inside of her lip, I’m like, that is SO cool, but I’m more bothered by how the ortho they did was dumb and wrong. They gave her a fake set of teeth to put overtop the 2nd set of teeth she has to make them look aesthetically better, but it still doesn’t change that she has a shark mouth. Well, whatever, I get into the shower, take off my pants and suddenly realize that I’ve been wearing this obnoxious vest and shirt that are 4 sizes too small for me, and I can’t remove it by myself. I’d given her my pants from inside the shower to put somewhere which she is more than happy to do, but a little excited and shy since I have no pants on. Given the desperation of my predicament, I ask her to step into the shower with me and help me take the shirt off, and there’s a huge smile on her face. She opens the curtain and steps in behind me.

Then I’m back in the original house and I watch out the window as the black dragon I’ve been after comes by looking for a new treat. I am powerless, but to my great satisfaction, a white, Asian dragon (in the vein of Spirited Away) gives it chase. I am happy that it has come full circle even if I failed my mission and…I wake up.

Analysis: my neighbor’s dog, I saw some fake dragon thing online the other day, worrying about losing my boy because he’s such an old man now, and I managed to tangle myself up in ny top sheet something awful which explains why I’d been having trouble removing that too-small shirt. Also I really had to go to the bathroom, hence a bathroom dream.

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Filed under animals, bathroom, dental, dogs, family, mess up, mission, teeth

bathroom, bone break, mission, power outage

A few clips here.

I was on a trip with family that included a group of people I was not familiar with, but we were all staying in the same house/dorm. My mom and brother were there along with some of my extended relatives. There were strangers my age and older. At one point, I was trying to use the toilet, but the house/dorm was set up in a strange shape: it was very narrow and long, so the bathroom (a communal bathroom) was this awkward set up where a toilet was directly in front of the door with very little room to get around it and no privacy walls whatsoever. Needing to use it very badly, I sat down on it, partially grossed out by it being a communal toilet in a more residential setting, then my brother comes in to use the shower and I’m irritated that he’s even in here, but he heads to my left to the male showers. Then a girl around my age or younger comes in too and at this point I don’t even care that I have my pants down and on the toilet. She sees me and starts to freak out, calling in her superior (our den mother? One of the chaperones?) to complain that I was using the toilet. I start to wonder in my head if I just hadn’t gone in far enough to see other toilets, when the woman comes in and I complain that I just needed to go to the bathroom, geez, and it’s a communal bathroom, what do you want!? She shakes her head and starts to talk to the girl (who looks suspiciously like the girl that I got into the car accident with) who dislikes that she didn’t get her way. I roll my eyes and keep doing my thing.

This next part has me on a mission again. My agent duties, this time it seems that it’s for a very powerful office, like, way up on the security level, detailing presidential level missions. There are some scenes in the high security office which seems like any office. Maybe it’s a field office? Anyways, it was smaller, tighter and staffed full of official looking people. We were checking up on the security defcon level and it was high, but the president was safe and well-detailed. I end up walking around in a mall. I think I’m supposed to be keeping an eye out for my target in the stores, a Latino young man, but I’m also undercover, just a girl out with some friends. I glimpse him once and take note of it, but he disappears. My friends turn out to be fellow agents and we are all very close and familiar, especially the one girl. There are some kiosks set up and check point in the mall entrances, so we use the kiosks (set up conveniently like in video games to give access to a location) to jump up onto the beams high above so that we can get a better look. I take note of the fact that if we leap over to the above the mall entrance area, there already has been set up for us an opening we can use to quickly jump out, either to chase or escape. We get down now and enjoy ourselves at the mall some more, getting food and shopping, when it’s finally time to chase. I don’t know what we’re chasing, just that we got the signal to go, go, go! As earlier we did, we jump up onto the top again. This time, however, I think I must have gotten a bit injured in whatever happened in the meantime (maybe a fight? Or maybe we were found out and drugged? The others seemed to know that I wasn’t up to snuff and were worried about me). As I balanced up top, my vision became a little blurry and unable to focus on the task ahead like the world was pulling away from me. Not only that, but no longer was there a walkway to reach the area above the mall entrance. I’d have to jump for it. The instant I made the jump, I knew it was a mistake. So did the others and they watched in horror as I slowly fell. I remember taking the same fall before in training, except this time I watched as if in slow-motion the very hard epoxy-coated floor, thinking in my head, wow this is going to hurt. I ended up on my left arm, breaking the joint. I remember after that, having to redo the section of the mission, this time with a clear head and an arm in the cast, a handicapped agent.

A bit of time later, I was demoted back to office worker in the same building. I didn’t like it, but it was temporary to build up strength again in my arm. It was boring and I didn’t  know what I was doing at all. I got an urgent call from a woman who was frantic and asking me for a favor, but I was only half listening for some reason I can’t remember. Maybe food, or a dog was distracting me. Something about a power outage and she needed to pay the bill right now because it was important!  I was embarrassed that I hadn’t been listening and my supervisor came in to ask what was going on, I told him it was urgent and he seemed to know right away who it was and that it truly was important. He ran off somewhere and the lady was still on the phone, who told me she was coming right now to the office to make it right! I hung up and was very confused at what was going on. It was dark and rainy outside. Why was I still at the office, and was it as simple as her not paying her bill and having the power cut off? Who was this? Either way, I see her right outside my window which is silly because my office overlooked a small, hilly, grassy area between two nondescript (rather ugly) professional buildings on the back end where there were trees and water. Maybe it was hush hush, because I opened the smaller window above my desk and climbed out, making sure the credit card reader and computer were easily accessed quickly from outside. By the time I made it onto the grass, she was sitting there on the ground with stacks of paper set up all around her, doing calculations? What? What kind of high tech presidential level security office was this? Maybe it was trying not to leave a paper trail? But then the credit card reader? It was raining, but the papers didn’t seem to be affected at all and I just stood there amongst it all, wringing my hands, nervous, powerless and not knowing what to do, but very aware of the criticalness of this clandestine request…my supervisor was nowhere to be found and had made it clear that none of the higher ups or other departments should know about this. I’d much rather be out in the field.

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Filed under bathroom, family, fear, injury, mission, shopping